Stinking Bishop

From Yahoo News

In the "hierarchy" of the mythological Anglican "communion" the question is often asked, "Who's in charge here anyway?" Today, I propose a candidate for the position of "The Big Cheese."

"Stinking Bishop has been officially voted Britain's most pungent cheese in the nation's first ever contest.

Britain's Smelliest Cheese Championships were held at The Royal Bath and West Show in Shepton Mallet, Somerset.

The Stinking Bishop, made by Charles Martell of Martell and Son in Gloucestershire, was described as smelling like a rugby club changing room.

The judging panel included Chris Rundle, a West country food and drink journalist, and Alec Lawless, perfumier and owner of Essentially Me natural perfumes.

The professional judges were joined by a group of junior judges, children aged 10 and 11 from Wells Cathedral School, who were selected for their sensitive noses.

The panel's chairman, Tim Rowcliffe of Antony Rowcliffe speciality cheeses, said: "The cheeses were all fantastically smelly but Stinking Bishop absolutely knocked us out."

Stinking Bishop is washed in a Gloucestershire perry made from a pear variety called Stinking Bishop. The pear was named after a reprobate farmer with an appalling reputation as a drunkard, who famously shot his kettle when it took too long to boil.

Mr Martell said: 'I'm thrilled and surprised to win. I hope more people will get into eating more speciality cheeses because there are so many in Britain - more than in France.'

Mike Pullin, chair of the Dairy Produce Awards and organiser of the championships said: 'This has been a brilliant opportunity to show off the creativity of British cheese-makers. We've also successfully proved that British speciality cheeses can give the French a run for their money.'

I say, put the Stinking Bishop in charge and let anyone who offends the Church have to face him/her in a small enclosed space for a theological stink off.

Please Lord, when you send us a new Bishop, don't send a stinky one!